I have been trying, for the past 24 hours, to figure out exactly what it is I did to piss the fates off this much. I haven't pinpointed it, but it could have something to do with the years between 16 and 23. This seems like an awfully late payback though.
I spent much of my day yesterday at the DMV. I discovered that they still do not make any sense at all. At least some things in the universe remain constant. Apparently despite being fully insured on my Jeep, I was still uninsured. I have an Oldsmobile that my father gave me. It became inoperable a few months back. We'd been using it as an extra "emergency" car when the engine finally blew. Since then I removed it from my insurance and have tried to find a charity that can use it. (I know there are a lot of "donate your car" charities, but typically I've found that most will just sell the car as salvage and take the money from that. I wanted a charity that could actually make use of the vehicle.) Well, apparently, because that car was uninsured, I have lost my license and will have to downgrade my insurance (from the ridiculously high amounts of coverage that I purchased to an SR-22 which covers just around state minimums) in accordance with state law and pay steep fines to get my license back. I'm currently appealing this, but it's the DMV. I see little hope in my appeal.
Also, the Jeep was totalled. I got a value on it today (less than what I owe, naturally) and went to get the rest of my things from it, only to find half of my things have gone missing. CD's (some are irreplaceable from our favorite local bands back home), a vintage pin, mini kleenex packs, my badge for work, and several others things gone. Just gone. Also I cannot purchase a new car now, until the whole license/insurance debacle is sorted out.
My friend who was in the car with me ended up in so much pain that she's been out of work the last few days. We're not sure when she'll be back. Luckily I'm feeling much better, but that doesn't make her feel any better.
I suppose this is one of those experiences that is supposed to make me grow as a person and have some miraculous outcome that makes me feel silly for having worried in the first place. Forgive me fates, for not seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I feel like I've lost my freedom and even though everyone that has seen where the accident happened agrees that there was nothing I could have done to prevent the accident other than not having been there, I can't stop feeling horrible about having hurt people. I suddenly realize why the people I talk to each day at work have that hollow sound in their voices, and often try to deny that they were in the wrong. The guilt is crushing. I will eventually work through it, I know that. Today though, I'm pretty miserable.
At least I've been getting a lot of knitting done. I'm so glad I took it up. It was about the only thing that kept me calm at the DMV, although security did keep a close watch on me while I was flashing around those threatening pointy sticks.
I've finished the back on the sweater and I'm to the armhole decreases on the left front. Those little pieces just fly, but I'm sure the button band will find a way to remind me again that I'm no super-knitter.
By the way, does anyone know how I should block this? Should I block individual pieces, or get everything put together first? Will blocking in pieces interfere with the picking up of live stitches later when I put on the hood? Also, since the hood is knitted on, won't I have to block it again once I finish the hood? Inquiring minds want to know. If anyone else knows, please, please clue me in.
One last thing. Since I upgraded to Beta, I've had some mention of comments not being accepted. From what I've found, you can comment, but as "someone else". Not as "anonymous" and not under your own sign in, you just have to type in your name, it should take it. if it doesn't, please email me froux2zj at verizon dot net.